So heartbreaking

When people aptly made unfavorable comparisons to my youngest sister, my mother would take it as a personal insult that she had unattractive daughter. It didn’t sit well with my mother and she was quick to vent it out on the person concerned. Because of the belief, my sister was treated like a real-life Cinderella, she was to stay at home, not to be seen or recognized as her daughter. And because of that too, my mother used to send my youngest sister to run errands at odd hours.

Years later, my sister told me that one night our mother asked her to buy a box of mosquito coils and threatened her with a beating if she didn’t come home with it. It was past the closing time of the sundry shop. My sister went from one shop to another. In her desperation she knocked hard on each and every shop and caused a ruckus. But out of the three sundry shops, only one displeased shopkeeper opened his door. He started to scold my sister for disturbing his sleep. She began to cry and explain that a box of mosquito coils would save her from a beating. Anyone with a heart wouldn't have denied her plea .

My sister told me that on one occasion she was trailing after our parents and brothers as my father was taking photographs of them in the compound of our house. Every time my sister managed to get a spot next to our brothers, my father would move away without taking the picture. It dawned on to her that they didn’t want her to be in the photograph. It was confirmed when she heard them say they didn’t want her to spoil the picture.

Are you sure you got it right? It was hard to believe at first that my father and my mother shared the same way of thinking. But you are not ugly, I assured my sister while absorbing the new information and seeing my father in a different light. He was indifferent but never cruel. So I didn't really know him.

Another heart-breaking story she told me was that she used to squat near the doorway of our parents’ bedroom. It was also one of those rare occasions when our father was home early and playing with our younger brothers. They sounded happy as they laughed and played like one happy family and my sister was like the outsider looking in.

During the school holidays, I normally spent them staying with one aunt or another. It wasn’t out of the kindness of my mother’s heart that she gave me time-out to be happy. It so happened I was invited by my cousins. Maybe she took pride that I was popular with my cousins. I don’t really know how my mother’s mind worked. One time I was even invited by her tailor to accompany her and her nephew to Penang. Permission was given. I was allowed to follow her home on another occasion.

My two sisters said I was luckier than them because I was allowed to go places. They said though I didn’t get our parents’ love I’d got it from our relatives. At that times I just went on with my own life, didn’t know that my sisters thought I was luckier than them. I didn’t know that my youngest sister hardly went anywhere.

One fine day, my mother came home from the market and told my youngest sister to bathe and dress nicely. My sister said she could remember how happy she was because our mother was taking her out. Little did she know that what she expected had nothing to do with our mother’s plan. The destination was about ten houses away. When they reached there my mother’s friend came out, my mother grabbed my sister’s hand and dragged her into the house. My sister started to cry when she realized that my mother was going to leave her there for the next few hours. My mother’s warnings soon translated into slaps when my sister refused to stop crying.